Blog EXCLUSIVE!: My very own Animator Portrait!

So, I realized that I've been doing these Animator Portraits for over 3 years now, and the one person I didn't have yet was- yup, yours truly.

Well, I thought it over for quite a while- how would I do it? did I even want to do it? would it count as a portrait?- and finally, I came to the decision. I wanted one. I just didn't know how the hell I was gonna take it. I thought about setting up a tripod, etc., but I know me. I HATE being in front of the camera. I like being safe and sound behind it! (And there I shall stay!)

So, I ended up talking to the Institute Photographer, an AMAZING photographer named Scott Groller. Annnd- long story short (TOO LATE!), we decided he would shoot me for my portrait. The date kept getting pushed back, but the week of Thanksgiving, Scott came into the cubes and shot me. (That always sounds so painful- haha!)

I am BEYOND happy with the photos he took. So many I love for so many reasons! But, as we all know, there can be only one. And I am presenting it here only.

Presenting- my Animator portrait.



I picked this particular shot for so many reasons. One- I look fabulous. Two- it emphasizes everything that I love about what I do and who I am. I love my hands, the way I hold my head when I draw (which I know isn't correct, but it's so me!), and I love 2D animation. Lastly, it is exactly what I aim to capture in every single portrait I take. It's the kind of photo I can send to my folks and they can be like, "Oh, look! There's our kid, working away at college." I know that may sound stupid, but it's the aim of this project for me. Because it's NOT a selfie. Because it's not taken on a cell phone. Because it's not taken at an arm's distance away. Because maybe it doesn't show me at my absolute best angle. But it's REAL. There's no pose- at least, not intentional. It's just me, the way I am.

I hope to continue this series for years to come- even after I leave CalArts. I hope to take Animator Portraits of my friends at studios and in their work spaces. This series is truly a product and work of love. And I am thrilled to now be included in it.

STRESS-STRESS-STRESS-FINALS-STRESS-STRESS!

Yes- blog title is correct. I am pretty sure there are more grey hairs on my head, but I've no time to inspect them. I am just assuming they are there at this moment.

The killer assignment this semester is Bruce Block's Film Grammar "book". We all breathed a sigh of relief the world has never known when he emailed us to tell us that he would NOT be requiring us to make a film this semester as well!

The book was to make 60 different pictures of the principles taught in class. Yes- SIXTY. Six of each. After the first week, when I tried to Photoshop it like everyone else, I got an email from Bruce informing me that I had to redo four of them. After that, I decided to *&^% Photoshop and the entire freaking day it took me to do all that- and I picked up my beautiful, faithful, trusty Rebel xTi. (< That's a camera.) Bruce said we were allowed to use photography if we so desired and I so did!

It ended up saving me a lot, but it ended up hurting a lot too. I am still bound to the campus for the most part (no time or car), so I was limited with what i could do, but DAMN! If I say so myself, I am pretty freaking happy with a bunch of these! Enjoy!














My ETERNAL gratitude to my models- Lexy, Phillip, Elizabeth, Aaron, Alexandra, Gavin, Clare, Onion, Sean, the reluctant Mirae, and the even MORE reluctant Rose!

Kyros Sculpture- Almost there...

"Almost there... alllmost there..."

God, I cannot tell you how badly I wish to be FINISHED with this sculpture! I am SO CLOSE! I mean, I can friggin' taste it! Okay, well, not really... unless I stick my Chavant-covered fingers in my mouth- but that's just GROSS!

I am doing last touch-ups on this sculpture for my grad review. Basically, making sure all his sides and stuff are smooth and even and stuff... yeah. That means raking. And if I had guitar wire of my own, he'd be done now. But I only have really thin wire. So I will have to finish him on Tuesday- PLEASE GOD- LET ME FINISH HIM ON TUESDAY!?!?!

In other news, saw Captain Phillips today. Nice movie, but the shay-cam nearly made me ralph. *shakes head* I will never understand the over-use of that stuff.







"IT'S AWAY!"

Kyros sculpture: progress

I am getting very close now to completely finishing my Kyros sculpture- which is a very good thing, seeing as how I have my grad review in a little under two weeks. I am absolutely thrilled with how he is looking.











I think a little more work on the arms to bring them back out, fixing the other elbow to have those neat old man skin wrinkles above them, clean up the waist fold of his chiton and then a polish down of the fabric and I think he'll be completely done! After all that, I'll clean and stain the base. I am thinking maybe Greek design motifs in it! EEEEEEE!!!!! *is getting excited* Maybe I could do that on the hem of his clothes too? Your thoughts?

I can't believe how well he came out. He basically looks exactly like I wanted him to- though I didn't know it when I started. I originally intended to keep 100% faithful to the animation design her has- very graphic and shape oriented, but I like this 3D version of him very much. It's nice to see him in a different mode.

In other news, as I said- grad review is coming up. Also, I am starting to look at job postings. I have more film studies for you, but that will have to wait for another post. Love you guys!

Ramblings

Sometimes I wonder about whether or not I should post my thoughts on this blog... Everyone I go to school with has a blog... most just post artwork. They never say anything. Now, I ain't sayin' that I have truly intense, moving, powerful, or truly though-provoking things to say... but I have thoughts and feelings and those inform my art, so they are an important part, right?

I have recently been having problems in that- I no longer feel like I have a "life". Yeah, check out that quote on the top of my blog. "Animation is about creating the illusion of life. And you can't create it if you don't have one." That is starting to concern me. I have no life.

I don't mean some sort of unattainable, unrealistic version of a life, involving traveling the world and eating baby rabbit, dipped in duck's tears, after nailing it to the garden roof and getting to work with the blow torch so it has just the right texture to match the squash you made that morning using just your elbows... I'm not saying that! I mean the kind of life where- I have WEEKENDS! Like one a month! Maybe a vacation every two years or something. A week off, or a holiday where I am not still holed up somewhere working- ALONE! A life where I have friends and SEE THEM REGULARLY! Where Facebook isn't so much a place where I see all my friends are having lives and enjoying them, but more a "oh yeah... look what so-and-so and I did last week! That was great..."- is that SO much to ask?

I dunno. Maybe it is. Maybe I am making this out to be bigger than it is. Honestly, Facebook is the devil. But when I leave campus, even for a few hours!, and suddenly feel like a "real human", something is wrong! Something is seriously wrong when I feel normal doing menial things like... driving. Or having lunch with a girlfriend- NOT in the Caf.

I want to live again. I want to not feel so... run down all the time. Both physically and creatively. I want to find that lively, vivacious woman that I know is deep somewhere, trapped in all the stress and anxieties of my fourth and final year at CalArts.

Also, I want a cat.

Film studies

Just posting a few of these. I've fallen behind. Been doing these every week and I am enjoying them immensely!

The films I've drawn from are Upside Down (2012), American Beauty (1999), and To Kill A Mockingbird (1962).

INSANITY!

I've figured it out! HOLY CRAP!

I AM GOING TO SCULPT AN OCTOPUS!!!!!!!

Lord, help me! Why did I decide to do this?! I haven't even started yet and I know I am going to regret this, but holy crap, I'm gonna do it!

I am so totally pumped!



...... by the by... does anyone know how to make someone look like a badass?